October 1990
ISSN 0894-2
The vivacious and charming Miss Cassandra Fetheroff made her debut at WSFA's First Friday In September cotillion.
Tastefully attired in a light summer pants suit of dark blue cotton speckled with little golden thingies, Cassandra, or Cassie to her friend, visited the Refreshment Cellar, the Business Center, the Literary Discussion Forum and the Front Hall of Chez Gilliland during the evening after the business meeting. Her conversation was sparkling, her manner demure and her reception impeccable. She charmed young and old alike. "We'll debauch her later," stated President of Vice Mr. John Smith.
Miss Fetheroff was escorted by noted WSFA personality Mr. Steven Fetheroff. Mr. Fetheroff introduced himself as Cassandra's brother. However, by the end of the evening, she denied being any relation.
The First Friday in September meeting came to as much order as these things ever get at 9:20, 7 September 1990.
Before the business session began, Joe Mayhew entertained the crowd by giving kisses to all present. The kisses were sweet and juicy and of the very finest quality. Everyone had at least one. In a remarkable display of stamina, Joe was still going strong after everyone else was tired. In the end, he couldn't give them away.
In the absence of President Tom Schaad, Vice President Steve Smith convened the meeting with the words, "Come on. Let's do it."
The Treasurer, Bob MacIntosh, reported that we had $7350.79 in the Treasury. A suggestion that we have a party failed for lack of a second.
Steve, gentleman that he is, called upon the Publications Committee for a report despite a suggestion from the floor that the Secretary not be allowed to speak. Mr. Vice called for the hours of the last meeting, commenting that the reports were now too long for mere minutes. Secretary Lee Strong confirmed Steve's insight by presenting the new 14 page WSFA Journal. We are well on our way to conquering the universe. There were three Ohs of appreciation and Erica Van Dommelen asked if WSFA should change the Secretary's name to Lee Miller. This suggestion died for lack of a second.
Disclave Past Chairfan Eva Whitley reported that the QE2 was wonderful. We ought to have the next possible Disclave aboard her. As far as Disclave Past was concerned, it's over. Resnick is in Africa.
Scott Dennis took 5 WSFA Resnick books to Worldcon and sold all five at hyperspeed. He should have taken 15.
Disclave Future Chairfan Peggy Rae Pavlat has signed hotel contracts with the hotel that we always disclave at. On being asked what the name of the hotel was, no one knew. Steve suggested the Hotel Generic.
Alexis Gilliland, Vice President of the Entertainment Committee, reported that the Committee was not feeling very well. Charles Gilliland, an official committee project, was having a good time at Worldcon. Unfortunately, he was very uninformative. The committee will cross examine him when he gets home.
Walt Disney's Fantasia will return on the First Friday in October. Those interested in a theater party, please contact Alexis.
John Pomeranz, Chairfan of the Committee to Spend a Great Deal of Money on Something Controversial and Incredibly Expensive, apologized for being nearly comatose. The reason this time is that he just returned from Europe last night.
John first attempted to announce that he had some stuff from the convention. This was ruled out of order.
John then delivered his report. Someone let the towelheads out of their sandbox again. The Committee was surprised that George Bush had not done the diplomatic thing and blasted their little raggedy heads off. In an effort to support our boys and girls in Sawdust Arabia, the Committee had performed a great deal of research and identified the major enemy of our soldiers. "Joey Heatherton?" asked a camel jockey from the floor.
"No, no," responded Sheik John. "The major enemy of our guys and gals is boredom." In an effort to combat this crisis, the Committee visited the Rotterdam red light district while allegedly visiting the Worldcon. However, the Chairfan couldn't get any even though he was a John. As an alternative, the Committee will purchase 100,000 pairs of ice skates to keep our troops on their toes. More details later.
The Committee also reported that the Washington Euro-American had endorsed Dave Clark for Mayor of DC. Both of DC's white voters were planning to vote for Mr. Clark.
There was no Old Business.
During New Business, Terilee Edwards-Hewitt will be running Silicon, an interactive role playing con. [See flyer on page 8 of The WSFA Journal.] Silicon would like to join the International Cookie Conspiracy. The ICC representative, Alexis Gilliland, said that was no problem. Eminent domain occurred a long time ago.
The Publications Committee announced that all wishing their announcements to appear as they wish should submit their wishes in writing to the Secretary after the meeting. We have our priorities right: we get the facts first and then mangle them.
A comment was heard that the next issue of The WSFA Journal should be bound. No one had the nerve to suggest that the Editor be bound.
Steve Fetheroff announced with bated breath the arrival of his sister, the somewhat troubled Cassandra Fetheroff. (I'd be troubled, too, if I were related to Steve.) Despite numerous calls for her to "come on down", Cassandra coyly chose not to appear in the WSFA business meeting. Comments were heard that we would never see her again.
Joe Mayhew was still giving kisses freely. The crowd was tired and
needed a cigarette.
Joe won Fifth Place in the Hugo Awards for Best Fan Artist. Stu Shiffman came in fifth from the bottom. He has previously been nominated 10 times without success. Joe has the Hugo list. Joe suggested that we nominate him 10 more times so that he would win and then get off our collective back. A great relief would follow.
Mike Walsh is considering quitting his job and moving to Northern California. The club applauded. He has books for sale for 50 cents each. He has a '86 Honda Civic for sale for 50 cents plus transfer fee. He has a room in a townhouse available 2 blocks from the Ballston Metro station. The price is 50 cents per month plus $399.50 handling fee per month. He has yuppie neighbors available for 50 cents each.
Eva Whitley read a sc**nc* f*ct**n book. Her first by Jack Chalker? someone asked. Yes. Upon hearing his name taken in vain, Jack appeared in the Chez Gilliland Business Center.
George Shaner nonrecommended the Lensman movie at the Biograph. #Don't bother#, George lensed. George also announced that his name is Shaner, not Shiner, as some unknown illiterate spelled it in a semi-serious fanzine last month. Picky, picky, picky.
Lance Oszko announced that the Polish tall ship Iskra is arriving in New York with artwork for World Fantasycon. He is taking a Care package of books for Polish fans.
Matt G. (Wild Cards) Leger made three announcements. First, the Q Link package tendered the Secretary is for the Commodore 64, not the Macintosh. If you want one, ask the Secretary.
Second, run, don't walk to see Les Miserables. It's wonderful.
Third, Matt has pictures from Coastcon, a Deep Deep Deep Deep South con held in Biloxi, MS.
Larry Baker is collecting a Care package of books for Peace Corps volunteers in Swaziland. Please contribute softbound books of any genre. Steve Smith has a friend in a group house who is looking for a roommate. See Steve for details.
John Pomeranz is not in law school. The club Ah'd in sorrow. So, he went to Europe instead. Tough luck, John.
Noted parliamentarian Steve Fetheroff moved that the business session adjourn. The session unanimously adjourned at 9:38.
The town of Vulcan, Alberta, Canada has asked Paramount Studios for permission to become the first Star Trek theme town. Most citizens already keep plastic "Spock" ears handy to impress the tourists. Beam me up, eh.
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The WSFA Journal is the official newsletter of the Washington Science Fiction Association (WSFA).
Publisher...........Tom Schaad
Editor in Chief.....Lee Strong
with a Cast of Millions
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The Third Friday in September regular business meeting came to a semblance of order at 9:11, 21 September 1990. The pounding of the gavel received a round of applause. Someone asked why the club was meeting at 9:11 rather than the scheduled 9:15. President Tom Schaad stated, "We're a futuristic organization and should be expected to do things ahead of time."
Before the meeting, Mary Morman asked Tom, "Can we do it now?" Tom replied, "Not tonight. I have a meeting."
Tom asked Secretary Lee Strong if he had the minutes of the last meeting. Lee said, "No." Quite firmly, I might add. Frustrated, Tom suggested that we waive reading the minutes. The minutes were waived with only two opposed. Joe Mayhew waved the Secretary instead. Tom noted that Covert Beach and Kent Bloom refused to waive the minutes and directed the Secretary to take their names. Tom did not explain what the Secretary was supposed to do with the confiscated names.
* After the meeting, the former Covert Beach stated that the joke was on Tom since he possessed a total of four names and would simply use his middle names until his usual names were returned.
Tom also announced that the Secretary had an attitude. What's it to you, buster?
Tom then asked Treasurer Bob MacIntosh for a report on the fiscal situation. Bob at first declined but relented when Tom pointed out that he (Bob) was within reach of the Presidential gavel. We have $7187.67 in the Treasury.
Disclave Past was not here. Apparently Eva heard about the Presidential gavel.
Disclave Present was not here. Peggy Rae Pavlat is off being Vice Chairfan of the San Francisco Worldcon bid. John Sapienza invited all to buy memberships after the meeting. Also see the flyer on the back cover of The WSFA Journal.
The Entertainment Committee was not here. Another victim of the Presidential gavel.
The Incredibly Controversial and Expensive Purchases Committee was not here either. Yet another victim terrorized by the Presidential gavel. A suggestion was made from the floor that we buy a box of giant bandaids for NASA to fix the space shuttle leaks. The suggestion was referred to the Committee.
The former Covert Beach, speaking for the Trustees, announced that the club had two new members: Pat Devine and Debra Rothschild. The club welcomed our new victims with a round of applause. Tom announced that they had the Presidential sympathy. (The gavel comes later, folks.)
The former Covert went on to say that the Trustees were charged with nominating a candidate for the position of Disclave 1992 Chairfan. After diligently pondering the WSFA Constitution, and carefully considering the two announced candidates, the Trustees decided to wimp out. Since having two official nominees is not against the Constitution, the Trustees nominated both Steve Fetheroff and Joe Mayhew for Disclave 1992 Chair. Feel free to jump in with nominations from the floor during the election meeting. See new business and the Secretary's Special Report on page 7 for the election date.
Despite the fact that we were still in Committee Reports, Tom asked the Secretary to make the traditional announcement about announcements. Lee said that he would not make it since that announcement does no good anyway and everyone knows it. Joe announced that this was the kinder and gentler Secretary.
John Pomeranz, Chairfan of the Committee to Spend a Great Deal of Money on Something Funny, arrived at the meeting. He stated that he was disappointed at the low turnout for WSFA meetings and that the Committee had decided to advertise for new members. They are cutting a videotape for Iraqi television. Details to follow. (Actually, people are afraid of the heavy handed Presidential gavel.)
There was no Old Business.
New Business: Tonight's hostess, Mary Morman, would like to be an Associate Member of Disclave 1991. Tom referred Mary to Peggy Rae. Mary preferred that WSFA do the honors. Tom insisted, stating, "Trust us. We're from the Government."
The former Covert Beach, speaking for the Trustees, announced that they had carefully reviewed their calendars and discovered that all three Trustees would be absent from the Third Friday meeting in October, when the election for Disclave 1992 Chair would normally take place. He moved we move the election to the First Friday in November. It was immediately objected that that would conflict with Fantasycon and Psicon. Several alternate dates were discussed. Joe suggested other options: the Trustees might appoint some alternates for the purpose of conducting the election, or we might consider further delays. What is the requirement to notify the members? It was pointed out that any election date would conflict with some con or another.
The former Covert accepted a friendly amendment by Tom: the election will take place on the First Friday in October; the Secretary and the Treasurer will notify the absent members; and they will report on notification at the next meeting. Members present at the Third Friday in September meeting are presumed to be notified. See Special Report following the Minutes.
The motion, as amended, passed by a ratio of many to several. Tom noted that the only 2 voters to oppose it were Vickie and Steve Smith. He therefore detected a Smith Conspiracy. Paranoia, anyone?
Mary Morman moved that WSFA split the cost of cleaning the Bloom/Morman living room carpet with the Bloom/Mormans. Approved. No Smith Conspiracy was detected.
The Secretary made two announcements. First, those wishing their announcements to appear as they wish should submit the announcement in writing to the Secretary after the meeting.
Second, based on the President's behavior, the coup d'etat will be easier than we anticipated. The President reacted with stunned resignation. This is not the same as resigning, darn it.
George Shaner is out of a job. It's just as well as he hated his old job anyway.
Terilee Edwards-Hewitt is running Silicon VI at the Holiday Inn, Annapolis. Thank Ghod, it's not the First Friday in October. See flyer in this issue for details.
Steve Fetheroff announced, first, that his parents were gone. The club cheered. Second, his sister, Cassandra Fetheroff, said thank you. A couple of rowdies hollered "You're welcome."
Brian Lewis got a rent reduction. His landlord is apparently desperate.
The poker Committee will meet downstairs. Hostess Mary Morman advised the Committee that the poker table is set up near the catbox. Keep the door open to accommodate the cat. The cat is not kinder and gentler.
Lance Oszko announced that the Iskra has docked with Polish artwork for Wall Street and with plans to steal our nation's wealth. If the poles want our nation's wealth, they should dock in Tokyo.
Mike Walsh mumbled something about books being for sale. He also stated that Father of Stones, first published by the WSFA Press, came in second for the appropriate Hugo.
Elaine Normandy and Jack Heneghan are settling into Texas nicely. They miss WSFA altho not Maryland. "Let's go visit them," suggested Mike Walsh. This proposal was referred to the Controversial and Expensive Committee.
There is no cutoff date for donating books for Swaziland Peace Corps volunteers volunteered Larry Baker.
The last stone for the National Cathedral will be (was) laid 29 September 1990.
Lee Uba is now the Decorating Den of Woodbridge, VA. The club applauded. If you would like Lee to decorate your den, phone her at (703) 494-6052.
Matt G. (Bionic Man) Leger announced that he had auxiliary legs (crutches) as a result of a doctor's party. He is on medication for the pain. "Any excuse for drugs!" shouted a rowdie from the floor.
The business session unanimously adjourned at 9:40.
The club charged the Secretary to notify all potential voting members that the election for Disclave 1992 Chairfan would be held at the First Friday in October meeting. The following people singed the roster at the Third Friday in September meeting and were therefore notified directly: Larry Baker, Sheryl Birkhead, Kent Bloom, Alex Cauthen, Jonathan Clark, Charles J. Divine, Terilee Edwards-Hewitt, Steven Fetheroff, Hal Haag, Dan Hoey, Brian Lewis, Dick Lynch, Nicki Lynch, Bob MacIntosh, Winton E. Matthews, Jr., Walter Miles, Mary Morman, Lance Oszko, Kathi Overton, John Pomeranz, Elvis Prestley, Roger Rabbitt, Dick Roepke, Naomi Ronis, John Sapienza, Tom Schaad, George R. Shaner, Steve Smith, Lee Strong, Adrianna Terrell, Kate Terrell, Lee Uba, Erica Van Dommelen, Michael J. Walsh, Beth Zipser, and Mike Zipser. The former Covert Beach and some others were identified as being at the meeting despite the lack of sign-up.
The Secretary deputized Joe Mayhew for assistance. Joe notified Shirley Avery, Irv Koch, and Jul Owings at the BISFIS party/meeting the night of 22 September 1990.
Lee Strong telephoned Don Bieniewicz, Dan Burgess, Dick Roepke for Chris Callahan, Susan Cohen, Charles Gilliland for the Gillilands, Linda Melnick, Judy Newton, Paul Parsons, Eric Pavlat for the Pavlats, Tom Schaad for Marianne Petrino, Rebecca Prather, John C. Randolph, Mary Ellen Scharadin, Mike Stein, Steve Vaughan-Nichols, and Eva Whitley on the evening of Monday 24 Sep 90. The duplicate messages to Roepke and Schaad were deliberate.
Lee also wrote F. L. Ahsh on Tuesday 25 Sep 90 since Flash is not known to have a telephone.
The Secretary was unable to obtain telephone numbers or addresses for Judy Fetter, or Dave Hunt. The telephone number for George and Kay Koelsch had been disconnected.
As of this writing, the secretary had not contacted Linda Ballard, Bob Oliver or Elaine and Steve Stiles. In addition, several life members who seldom attend meetings were not contacted due to the inordinate difficulties required to reach them.
The Secretary thanks everyone who contributed to this election notice effort.
Lee Strong,
Secretary, WSFA,
29 September 1990
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An American diplomat formerly stationed in Kuwait reported a previously unsuspected hazard of war... at least when Iraqis are involved. He returned home (in Kuwait city) to discover that his house had been ransacked by Iraqi soldiers. Among other things, they took two bottles of French champagne, a case of Dutch bheer, and a case of Gainesburgers.
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